What a counting game, just numbers, no souls….
Hare Krishna
I was distributing in Kassel, a big city in Germany. It was during the Marathon. I had a quota of 100 Books a day. I really wanted to distribute that much. The previous days had been very nice. But this day my mentality became that of an ass. WORK WORK WORK. No compassion, no Krsna, no taste…. Oh what a counting game, just numbers, no souls….uff tough stuff.
In the first 3 Hours I distributed 25 books. I distributed from 9 – 12 then I took a break and again from 2pm to 7pm. That was my schedule. Well, my heart was closed, people didn't stop, I could not connect….tough.
I saw a drunk young lady, maybe around 23 years old, suffering. She didn't have much clothing on, not a big jacket, and it was below zero. I presented to her a book, and said, "I'm a monk and we distribute these books.
"How much?" she asked.
"Nothing, it is my present for you!" ,
"How much do people usually give?" she asked again.
"3 euro." I said, which was a smaller amount, normally 5 euro.
"But you don't have to give."
"No I want to give you something." She gave maybe 80cents.
I went for a break in the Van. As I started my distribution around 2pm, my heart was still closed. 75 books to go. No one stopped and I thought that I will not reach my quota. I was so much into the numbers.
Again I saw this Lady begging, freezing, drunk to forget to cold. Just suffering. I wanted to give her some warm prasadam. We still had some dhal left. But my selfish mind switched in: "No it's the marathon, it will cost you at least 20-30 and during this time you could distribute 10 books." So an internal fight was there. Good and bad Angel. Then I dicided to approach her and asked if she is hungry. She said she was. I told her, "Wait here, till I come back." So I ran to the Van, heated up the dhal, filled it in a plastic bottle and brought it to her.
She was so greatful that I gave her this Prasadam. She happily ate. Then she approached me, opened her wallet and gave me 3 euros more, she actually begged very hard for this laxmi. Gauranga!!!
After that incident, because I took some time to care personaly for a soul, and I gave up on "my own strength," Krsna opened up the curtain. The people stopped, the flow and love was there, my heart was open. In the last four hours Krsna let me distribute around 80 books. So the quota was also fullfilled.
This was an incident I will never forget. It is not our strength, by which we can get a result. It is Krishna, who gives to those who are living the truth.
Your Servant
Madhupati Das,
Hare Krsna
